Aug 10, 2007

of cows, bulls and bullshit

Ripped this off Pear's blog. I swear I almost punched my LCD screen, but didn't because its MY LCD screen.


In the textbook corporation,
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and
produce twenty times the milk.
You then create clever cow cartoon images called ‘Cowkimon’ and market
them World-Wide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and
milk themselves.

A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are mad.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are.
You break for lunch.

A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5,000 cows and none of which belong to you.
You charge others for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You feed them milk hormones to produce milk non-stop
You have 300 people milking them round the clock.
You claim full employment and high bovine productivity.
You have the newsman who published the story arrested.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You worship them.

A MALAYSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You signed a 40-year contract to supply milk at RM0.06 per litre.
Then midway through, you raised the price to RM0.60 or you cut the
supply.
When the buyer agrees to the new price, you change your mind again and
now want RM1.20.
The buyer decided you can keep the milk.
They go look for milk that comes from recycled cows or the cow urine
instead. Your two cows retire together with the Prime Minister.

A SINGAPOREAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
One cow-peh and one cow-bu

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